For people who have gone through divorce, Valentine’s Day can be an emotional roller coaster. The day is filled with both happy and sad memories. Although it may be painful to remember past Valentine’s Days spent with your ex-spouse, try not to let the pain ruin your life today. There are many things that you can do to get through the day on a positive note. Here are some tips for surviving this holiday after divorce.
Getting lost in work or activities will help you forget about the holiday, while helping you get through it at the same time. If possible, take on extra responsibilities at work or volunteer for a charity event that day. The distraction will be welcome, plus you will have something positive to reflect on later when reminiscing about happier times during this holiday season.
This may seem counterintuitive, but stay away from places where there are likely to be many single people celebrating the holiday. Whether it is a crowded bar, restaurant, or some other singles gathering place, it is best to avoid these places. You could even stay home, if possible, and still have a positive and productive day without the bad feelings of being single again on Valentine’s Day. The thought of watching other couples in love will only sour your mood further, so why put yourself through that? Do not focus on things that you do not have. Focus on the things that are positive in your life right now.
Focus on Your Children
If you have children, remember that they probably view Valentine’s Day as an innocent day of celebration rather than a couples holiday. Under no circumstances do you want to ruin their fun just because you do not enjoy being single. The best thing you can do for them is to be upbeat and positive while maximizing this special day together. Surprise the children with extra special activities or treats on Valentine’s Day; it will help keep your mind off your ex-spouse while bonding with the little ones. Make your youngsters the focus of the holiday. If possible, take them someplace fun that you know they will enjoy and you will end the day on a positive note.
Be Good to Yourself
If you have had a rough day so far, remember that you deserve to enjoy yourself occasionally. Try something special for dinner, pamper yourself with a manicure or facial at the local spa, or watch your favorite movie while munching on a treat that you would not normally allow yourself to indulge. The more positive energy you put toward this holiday, the better it will be overall.
Avoid Social Media
This might be difficult to accomplish for most people. Social media is addictive, and many people spend an inordinate amount of time looking at their phones and engaging with social media apps. Spending too much time on social media is a problem on any given day. However, it can make Valentine’s Day especially difficult and painful. You may be potentially exposed to many reminders of the fact that you are alone on this special day. There will likely be many pictures of couples doing special things for each other. When looking at things such as this, you can be both happy for them and also jealous and start to feel depressed. It is best if you just avoid that scene all together and focus on the positive, real things in your life.
Be Honest with Yourself
There is nothing wrong with admitting to yourself that you are either sad or feeling a bit down. Also, it is OK to admit that you may even miss your ex-spouse, especially on a day like this, and even if you were the one who initiated the divorce. The point is to try not to fool yourself about how you really feel. Once you admit to yourself and examine your true feelings, it is easier to deal with them. There is nothing wrong with feeling sad or mad or even jealous of other couples when you are alone on Valentine’s Day. But to deal with those feelings, you have to first admit to yourself that they are there and attempt to work through them. This will help you come up with things to do that will make the day more positive.
Spend Time with Friends
If you do not have children to enjoy on Valentine’s Day, try to find some friends with whom you can get together. It is OK to be honest with your friends about how you are feeling about the day. It is good to plan ahead as well. Maybe have a small party with a handful of friends. It is especially good if you have friends going through the same situation as yourself. If you have a friend who has also been divorced and is single on Valentine’s Day, it might be good to have that person around. You and your friend should do more than just complain about your life and bring each other down. But you two can certainly talk about what real life is like and you can compare notes. Talking about your problems with someone who knows what you are going through is always a good way to feel better about things.
Towson Divorce Lawyers at Huesman, Jones & Miles, LLC, Have Been Helping Couples with Getting Divorced for Over 30 Years
Going through a divorce is sometimes emotionally difficult and contentious, but it does not have to be. Having the right team of divorce lawyers on your side will go a long way toward accomplishing the divorce in a professional manner and making sure that you are being treated fairly. The Towson divorce lawyers at Huesman, Jones & Miles, LLC, have been helping couples with divorce issues for over 30 years. Our legal team is experienced in helping clients reach a mutual agreement that will benefit the entire family. For more information and a free consultation, complete our online form or call us at 443-589-0150. Located in Hunt Valley and Towson, Maryland, we serve clients throughout Baltimore, Baltimore County, Bel Air, Bentley Springs, Columbia, Freeland, Hereford, Hampton, Westminster, Essex, Monkton, Sparks Glencoe, Parkton, Phoenix, Pikesville, White Hall, Carroll County, Harford County, and Howard County.