Divorce trends have stayed steady in the United States over the past two decades with an estimated 40-50 percent of marriages dissolving within the first 15 years. While the rate of divorce has not changed much, a new trend of divorcing with dignity is on the rise.
According to Wendy Paris’ new book, Splitopia: Dispatches from Today’s Good Divorce and How to Part Well, many divorcing couples are looking at divorce from a different angle that focuses on redefining the family relationship between parents and children. Paris interviewed over 200 divorced individuals and a host of divorce lawyers, therapists, and coaches to compile what she believes is a portrait of modern divorce wherein couples aim to redefine the family structure to minimize the trauma on their children. With an emphasis on successful co-parenting, spouses can continue to foster positive family relationships, build traditions, and celebrate milestones way beyond divorce.
Relationships that end because of infidelity, domestic violence, or addiction are less successful at amicable divorce than those that end because of irreconcilable differences. The key element most responsible for a successful split is each partner’s willingness to accept responsibility for the divorce. When each spouse can identify the role that they played in the divorce, bitterness and resentment diminish, allowing them to work on establishing a unique friendship post marriage.
Many couples are opting to live in close proximity to each other to encourage daily interaction with their children. Some choose to remain in the family home, often living in different rooms or on different floors, while others are choosing a new trend referred to as “bird nesting.” In this scenario, the parents rotate in and out of the family home while the children stay put, making transitions much less stressful for all involved. Finding creative solutions to living arrangements can benefit everyone emotionally as well as financially.
With Amicable Divorce, Everyone Wins
As the family unit is redefined, traditions, celebrations, and even vacations can include both parents and extended family members. When the divorced couple gets along, extended family and friends tend to have a positive and comfortable relationship with each of them as well. When the divorced couple remains active in the daily lives of their children, responsibilities are also shared, relieving stress on both the parents and children. Simple tasks such as taking out the trash, dropping off and picking up children from school or daycare, staying home from work with sick children, and attending sporting events and extracurricular activities become less of a chore and more enjoyable when they are shared.
Paris points out that her own divorce led her to see the benefits of an amicable split. She realized that once she and her ex dropped the expectations that came with the role of husband and wife, they relied less on each other emotionally, which helped them build a new relationship based on friendship. As time moved forward, she and her ex-husband became involved in new relationships, which proved to be less threatening to their children because the positive friendship remained between them.
Towson Divorce Lawyers at Huesman, Jones & Miles, LLC Promote Amicable Divorce
Divorce is never easy, but it can be less stressful and more successful when a couple is committed to treating each other with respect and kindness. The Towson divorce lawyers at Huesman, Jones & Miles, LLC are dedicated to helping their clients take the least stressful path to an amicable divorce.
Call us at 443-589-0150 or contact us online to schedule a consultation today. Our offices are conveniently located in Hunt Valley, Towson, and Pikesville allowing us to reach clients in Baltimore County, Carroll County, Howard County, and Harford County, including the cities of Towson, Essex, Bel Air, and Columbia.