A decision to get a divorce often comes after a person has put much thought, energy, and effort into saving his or her relationship. Many people seek advice from therapists, family, and friends before coming to the conclusion that their marriages are indeed over. Often, the other spouse is not aware of the partner’s dissatisfaction.
It can be very difficult to talk with a spouse about the desire to divorce. If both sides are in agreement that the marriage should end, then the discussion can be less volatile than if a partner is blindsided by the demise of the relationship. In any case, it is important for people to keep several things in mind when announcing a divorce:
Mean What You Say
- Divorcing is very serious and it should not be used as a threat during the heat of an argument. It is important to be certain that you want a divorce before announcing it to family, friends, and most importantly, your spouse.
Plan the Discussion
- You may want to write down your thoughts about how you will present the fact that you want out of the marriage. Avoid playing the “blame game” and discuss how you feel. Use “I” statements as often as possible. This can help prevent your spouse from getting defensive, angry, or simply ignoring your wishes.
Choose the Right Time
- While it is important not to drag out the inevitable, taking some time to decide when and where to broach the subject of divorce will make for a more productive conversation. It is better not to have the discussion late in the evening or before your spouse has to go to work. The best time may be at the start of a weekend so both parties involved have time to process the situation before beginning another work week.
Stand Your Ground
- If you are the one making the decision, you may actually feel a sense of relief after announcing your desire to divorce. Keep in mind that your spouse may not have those same feelings and as a result could possibly feel angry, upset and desperate. Anticipate and respect those understandable feelings.
Make Sure that You are Safe
- If you are worried about how your spouse may react and believe that your safety is in jeopardy, it would be beneficial to announce the divorce in front of a neutral party and/or at a public place.
Be Sensitive and Stay Calm
- The calmer you are, the more likely you are to be aware of how your partner may be feeling. Showing as much compassion as possible while being direct and unwavering will help make things easier when it comes to the initial stages of divorce, handling the logistics of dissolving the marriage, and dealing with any children who may be involved.
Even though the desire to divorce is often difficult for people to face, announcing the decision is an important step when beginning to rebuild lives.
Bel Air Divorce Lawyers at Huesman, Jones & Miles Provide Unique Representation for Individuals facing Divorce in Maryland
If you or someone you know is pursuing divorce and is in need of a Maryland family lawyer, Bel Air divorce lawyers at Huesman, Jones & Miles have a proven track record of successfully negotiating divorce settlements. Our team of compassionate lawyers work hard to ensure the best possible outcome for our clients. Our Hunt Valley law firm serves Maryland residents throughout the Baltimore area in Baltimore County, Carroll County, Harford County and Howard County as well as the communities of Towson, Bel Air, Columbia, Westminster and Essex. Call our Bel Air divorce lawyers today for a free consultation at 443-589-0150 or contact us online.